Trash Chronicles

1. Mark Viduka Has Retired – Finished. Finito. Gone. Left. Departed. Moved on. Australia’s classiest striker has left a huge void in the final third that people are going to have to simply accept will never be filled in the same way. The national team was built around Viduka under Hiddink and now has had to be rebuilt around the hole that he has left under Verbeek. He didn’t score very often but boy was his presence important.

2. Scott McDonald Hasn’t Scored – 15 games. 0 goals. It’s a striking statistic (no pun intended) that best reflects the plight of a national team who will struggle to find the back of the net in South Africa. All of his goals for Celtic, including strikes against AC Milan and Manchester United, will mean nothing to Australia fans if he can’t find the net with the same regularity for the Socceroos. One of those players who arguably isn’t of much use if he’s not scoring...

3. Lucas Neill Is Australia’s Best Defender – Unspectacular but effective, the fact that Neill is our best defender highlights a lack of quality at the back. It’s no attack on Neill, who I’ve been quick to point out remains an outstanding performer whenever he dons a green and gold jersey, but the fact remains that he is slow and lacking in ball-playing skills and technical quality. Don’t expect to see Australia play their way out of the back against the world’s top sides...

4. Tim Cahill Is The Only World Class Socceroo – Don’t get me wrong, Mark Schwarzer is an outstanding goalkeeper. His exploits though are more down to an incredible level of consistency and professionalism, rather than any X-Factor. That’s what Tim Cahill has in spades and that’s why he continues to be the man to rescue Australia from the most dire of situations. What does truth #4 mean for Australia? It means that once he’s marked out by the world’s top defenders in South Africa – and believe me, they’ll know to come for him – the Socceroos lose their most potent goal-scoring threat.

5. Harry Kewell Is Not The Player He Was – The hunger, level of performance and competitiveness are all still there but the pace and ability to beat players is not. The latter characteristics were, after all, what made him so valuable to the Socceroos in the first place; who can forget the way he waltzed around Ferdinand at Upton Park in that famous 3-1 victory? These days though, Harry resorts to more subtle means of influence, leaving the Socceroos without a single player capable of beating the world’s best defenders. Tends to score from the penalty spot more than from open play these days...

6. Australia Has One Proven Goalkeeper – Mark Schwarzer is, at his best, unbeatable. He’s proven on the biggest stages of international football and at pressure-cooker moments (see, spot-kick saves vs Uruguay, 2005). He’s also 37 years old. That means that he’s potentially susceptible to injury and misfortune, despite the fact that he has kept himself in pristine condition courtesy of an ultra-professional lifestyle. Assuming he were to miss the World Cup for whatever reason, would Australia fans be confident in the candidates to replace him? When was the last time Ante Covic, Michael Petkovic, Brad Jones or Adam Federici put in a confident performance for the senior men’s national team?

7. Australia Lack Pace – List Pim Verbeek’s starting XI in your head and see if you can pick out even one player whom you would be able to deem ‘fast’ by international standards. Anyone capable of tearing down the wing or through midfield at full-speed, breezing past opponents with or without the ball? Scott McDonald isn’t particularly quick and grabs most of his goals by virtue of his positioning and movement rather than raw pace. The same applies to Tim Cahill. At the back, the lack of speed is conspicuous in veterans Moore, Neill and Chipperfield...

8. Australia Lack Depth – For every first-choice Pim Verbeek player, pick someone outside of that line-up who plays in the same position. Compare experience, ability and level of performance for the Socceroos. Here are a few examples: Patrick Kisnorbo to replace Lucas Neill, Mile Jedinak to replace Jason Culina, Carl Valeri to replace Vince Grella, Brett Holman to replace Tim Cahill, Dario Vidosic to replace Mark Bresciano. Catch my drift?

9. Italy Outclassed Australia In Kaiserslauten – Remember that “dive” by Fabio Grosso? Forget about it. Instead cast your minds back to the opening stages of that mach before Materazzi’s sending off for a two-footed lunge on his own player. Mark Schwarzer and some particularly poor finishing were responsible for Australia not being 3-0 down. The Socceroos were shown to be a long, long, long way away from the best in the world and not much has changed since then – as an understrength and disinterested Dutch side showed in Sydney.

10. Pim Verbeek Won’t Change – Hoping to see a cavalier, “three points or no points” approach in South Africa? Don’t. Pim Verbeek knows the limitations of his squad and will stick to his tried, trusted and ultra-conservative methods, both with regards to player selection and tactical set-up. Expect the Socceroos to try to scrape their way into the knockout stages courtesy of fortune, set-pieces and stalemates.